day 178: randomize me

Kazzy

day 178: randomize me

All four boys were in and out tonight as Geo and I sat on the couch for our date and talked (tomorrow night we are going to Salt Lake for a fancy-shmancy dinner at The Roof for Valentine's Day).  #4 was hanging out with the neighbors before he left to go to a movie with his good friend, #3 was at a friend's house before he ran home to change before he went laser tagging with some young men and women in Provo, #2 was a little late getting home from work, and then he left to play games at a friend's house, and we were even delighted to get an unexpected visit from #1 son on his way back to his apartment after attending a wedding reception of a friend.

This is our life, both literally and figuratively.  Between school for 5 of the 6 of us, jobs for half of us, church stuff for all of us, and social lives for everyone, we are like drops of water skirting around on a hot pan.  We bounce and wiggle and, every now and then, come together.  Efforts are very deliberate for me and my husband.  We have to plan any moment we want to spend together.  It is calculated and scheduled and counted on.  I don't know that we are that different than most couples/ families, but right now we are stretched to our limit.

In another place and time, far far away, things will slow down and I will be able to breathe again.  I will be able to turn off a morning alarm and roll over.  But today, in this place and time, I sit up fast and get everyone going.  I start making lunches while people pour into the kitchen rubbing their eyes and looking for papers I need to sign.  I run and shower before I have to drop people where they need to be.  I get back home and clean up, sit down with my books and want oh-so-badly to take a mid-morning nap, but do homework instead.

And buried way beneath my notebooks, my IEP files, and my dirty dishes, is a happy mom, wife, student, teacher, that loves life and counts numerous blessings.