day 300: a reason to be
When Geo and I were first married I have this specific memory of lying in bed looking at him and thinking, We have some real things ahead of us in life. I am not sure what that was supposed to mean all of those years ago, but I do know we have, and may yet have, real things to do. Is it presumptuous to say that there are big things I am supposed to be doing? Or that I have felt like I have a real purpose? I have strong feelings in this direction, and I ask this in all humility.My special ed gig feels like it is just, right. Like it accidentally fell into my lap and fit perfectly. Fate, I guess. If you believe in that kind of thing. But that is only part of the whole I-have-a-purpose thing. My kids, my husband, our family; all contributing factors in my sojourn.
And I move forward in faith, knowing I have a reason to be.
9 comments
Looking ahead can be fun at times. So can looking back at all that has been.
Oh lovely. I feel that way too, but only sometimes. Like it's a vision I'm only allowed to catch occasional glimpses of. And there's a worry that comes with it, that the potential of that purpose is conditional.
Love the way you trust and proceed in life!
Kazzy, I am amazed at the things you make me think about with your one little post a day. Love this.
(Also, I loved your post about your husband the bishop. How at the end you said you were madly in love with him. It made me smile, chuckle a little bit.)
Great pondering.
I think you are right where you need to be.
It is in now way presumptuous to assume you have big things to do in this life. I often feel that way as well. Or maybe I'm just busy because I'm crazy. Hmmmm.
In my opinion, just knowing you have a reason to be here is enough, not necessary to know what it is exactly. Sometimes things you do cause a reaction and you don't know about it or are not aware of it. But it is still real. Know what I mean?
I know I say this here a lot...but...you say so much with such brevity.
Lovely and powerful and perfect.
I remember that same feeling after we got married. Such a certain beginning full of promise.
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